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Helping Kids Feel Good About Food

How can I encourage healthy eating habits when every meal feels like an uphill battle?

August 21, 2023

When every meal feels like a battlefield, it’s more than just ‘what will they eat?’ For many parents, it’s navigating sensory issues, oral motor delays, and a constant guessing game.

The dinner table can feel like a war zone some days. You’ve made their favorite meal—at least, it was their favorite yesterday—and now it’s met with crossed arms and a firm “no.”

For parents of autistic children, the challenges often go deeper than pickiness. When most folks talk about “picky eaters,” I can’t help but feel they don’t quite grasp the depth of the challenge some families, including mine, face daily. Our journey isn’t just about likes and dislikes; it’s about sensory issues, oral motor fatigue, and navigating a maze of dietary constraints. 

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Raising healthy eaters isn’t about perfection—it’s about persistence, creativity, and finding small ways to engage your child in their food journey. And while it might feel overwhelming now, these tiny steps can help your child develop a positive relationship with food over time.

The Power of Connection Through Food

Encouraging healthy eating habits isn’t just about getting your child to eat more vegetables. It’s about creating opportunities for connection, play, and learning around food. When meals are approached with patience and creativity, they can become moments of joy—not just for your child but for your entire family.

My Toolkit for Nurturing Nutritious Choices

Over the years, I’ve learned that small, intentional steps are the key to encouraging healthy eating habits in my children.  Feeding therapy sort of helped, but the act of actually collaborating with my kids made the difference. That and a bucket of patience.

Here are some of the methods that have worked for us:

  • 1. Play with food design

    Blueberry smiley faces anyone?

    Food doesn’t have to be boring—it can be art! Some playful ideas we’ve tried:

    • Making silly faces with fruit on oatmeal.
    • Creating fun shapes out of sandwiches.
    • Trying “ants on a log” (celery, peanut butter, and raisins).

    It’s not about perfection or even getting them to eat it—it’s about making nutritious foods feel approachable and fun.

    (BTW, my kids won’t even eat ‘ants on a log,’ but the exposure and laughter make it worth it!)

  • 2. Turn food into a learning game

    We created flashcards with different foods—fruits, vegetables, even treats—and turned them into a game.

    We categorize foods by type (fruits, veggies), how often to eat them (anytime, sometimes, rare), or even by color. This makes learning about food interactive and introduces the idea of “eating the rainbow” in a fun way.

  • 3. Grocery Store Scavenger Hunt

    Grocery shopping has gone from stressful to an adventure! We use the food flashcards as their “list,” and they hunt for the items in the store. If they find everything, they get to pick one new fruit or veggie to try.

    Bonus: We also read labels together and talk about why we’re choosing certain ingredients. Giving kids this ownership makes them more excited to eat what they’ve picked!

  • 4. Grow Food Together

    There’s something magical about planting a seed, watching it grow, and using it in a meal.

    Whether it’s herbs on the windowsill or veggies in the backyard, this hands-on experience helps kids understand and appreciate the journey from farm to table.

  • 5. Cook Together

    Cooking together adds another layer to the experience. Kids are more likely to try foods they’ve helped prepare (or, in my son’s case, at least make sure everyone else tries them!).

    Choosing recipes, shopping for ingredients, and getting involved in the kitchen all help them feel more comfortable with food—and it’s progress, not perfection, that counts!

Mini Coaching Moment

Start With One Fun Food Activity

Choose one strategy to try with your child this week. Maybe it’s creating a food design or exploring a new fruit at the grocery store. Focus on making it fun and low-pressure—success isn’t about what they eat today; it’s about building a foundation for the future.

Why It’s Worth It

The road to raising healthy eaters isn’t easy, but it’s a journey worth taking. Every small step—every food they touch, every smile during a playful meal—builds a healthier, more positive relationship with food. And along the way, you might discover that these moments of connection are as nourishing for you as they are for your child.

Struggling to navigate mealtime challenges with your child? Let’s connect in a clarity call to explore strategies tailored to your family’s needs and create a path to stress-free, joyful meals.